Gotcha!

I kinda feel that linking to a blog from your twitter, to get people to go there, cause you need more than 140 characters to say something could be considered Twitter-cheating.

Don't ever touch my empty-box.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuMZ73mT5zM

Nudge nudge, know wha' I mean?

My co-worker showed us this site, and... well, let's say we spent some time trash "talking" each other with a british accent

Be warned. It can be addictive...

http://www.acapela-group.com/text-to-speech-interactive-demo.html

Dogs vs. Cats

I like animals. Almost every animal. But when it comes to cats and dogs I'm most definintly a dog person. I've had dogs since I was 4 years old. Now it's about 5 years since the last one though.

A Dog is a friend who never lets you down and is always glad to see you. You can yell at them and they'll keep coming back with the tail between their legs, knowing that they done wrong. Dogs will kiss your ass to get your attention. Literally.

Cats are evil. They can can look at you as if you were the biggest idiot that ever walked the earth with out any reason what so ever. You can scream and shout at them and they look at you like "really..." and walk away. A cat would never ever lower it self to kiss your ass. Not even figuratively.

Some might say cats have personality. And they do. The demon kind. Dogs got personality too.

If my friends demand I suck up to them too be friends I'm way better off without them. And if you waste energy trying to get a cat, who really don't give a crap about you, to like you, then you're better off without it.

Of course the people (at this point I wont call them family) I live with want a cat. Okay, I know that if they wanted a dog, I'd be the one walking it in snow and rain at unchristian hours of the day.

They say that I wont have to empty the litterbox.

They say they'll buy a scratching post so my precious sofa wont be clowed to peices.

They say I wont have to do anything.

They are 4. I'm only 1...

Do I believe them? No. Will I give in? Of course

I just know it will kill me in my sleep...

Mmmkay

I've removed the word verification for comments because you keep nagging about it. Now let the comments flow!

I'm still approving it before it shows on the blog though :P

It's over...

Oh, and I broke up with David Faustino aka Bud Bundy. Didn't end in a very nice way... So sad. Guys.... (right?)

What would the frog do?

This morning I was going to drop the kids off at school as any normal day. Judge by my suprise when I got in to the car and the DTE (Distance To Empty) showed 0. Zero. Nothin'. I don't have to translate km to miles or anything for you to understand. Because Nothing is Nothing in both km and in miles. So, at this time I was a bit late. My car told me it had to be fueld. And my kids kept nagging amongst themselves. So what to do?

It's like that frog who sat on a small rock. Around the rock swam crokodiles. And the distans to the shore was too long for the frog to jump. Now that frog HAD to get to shore. He was late for a bar mitzvah or something, IT'S NOT IMPORTANT. So he sat there... He couldn't swim. He couldn't jump and he couldn't fly. So what did he do? Yes, he flew. What? Frogs don't fly? Well what the hell was he gonna do?

So what did I do? I drove. WHAT THE HELL WAS I GONNA DO? 2.5 km (1.6 miles) to closest petrol station. I actually made it there. And dropped the kids off. And I made it to work. But of course I was late. But so was everyone else too, so no harm.

The moral of the story is to never let your girlfriend borrow your car without letting her pawn her VISA-card with you.

Oh Your God!

Something that always suprise me is when people, that seem pretty normal, normal like... me, all of a sudden start rambling about God. "Thank you God! I would not have managed to get this job, if it weren't for You, O'God!"

Don't get me wrong, I think you should be able to believe in God, Santa or the Tooth fairy.

That's all up to you.

You might think that your God helped you to get that job, or that you some how angered Him so you broke your leg, or He helped you get laid.

Me, I think You got that job because You deserved it. Or you lied your ass off on the interview. And I think you broke that leg because You shouldn't ride your bike under the influense of Alcohol. And maybe, just maybe, You did or said something right that got You laid.

But that's just me. I have trouble believing in myself sometimes. But I think You are your own God. You make Your decisions and You deal with the consequences.

I don't think there's a master plan or that someone is sitting there, watching us. Well, not counting the NSA or CIA.

If you believe in God as a Christian or a Muslim you must also believe in the Devil. Because there can not be a greater Good without a greater Evil. I believe in Good and Evil. But I believe that it's also the human nature. There's nothing divine or demonic about it. I can be wrong about Kim Jong II though.

I do think the morals that Christianity has given us, and that our civilisation is based on, is good. Common sense though. You shall not kill!! No? Ok...

What I wanna say with this blog post is (I think) that I think you should focus more on yourselves. You are what matters. And what You do matters. You have no idea what will happen after death. So to fear a God seems pointless. If there's a God, He shouldn't t be feared, I'm sure of it. He (or She or It) would want you to enjoy life and take care of yourselves and your loved ones. And make the best of your life. Make it count.

Of course I could be wrong.

But I kinda agree with Einstein. That "To believe in God is childish"

Does that make me as bright as Einstein? Yes, I'd like to think so...

104 vs. 60

At this writing moment I've got 104 followers on Twitter. And I'm following 60 myself. You might think that's great, and that I must be really awesome. But no, that's not it. Let me show you. Out of my 104 followers there are :

* about 10 "people"(probably just 1 or 2 with alot of accounts) that wants me to follow links they post that makes me end up at some porn site.

* about 10 people that wants me to follow them back so that they can make money out of me following links on how to make money from people following your links. These people tend to leave and return every now and then.

* about 8 people that followed me because they searched a special word and that way found me. They often leave in 1 min to 5 days. But are shortly replaced by another word searcher. I once made fun of Bibel studies, which gained me a religios follower that still actually follows me....

* about 6 people that followed me and then forgot their twitter password, or died, and haven't been logged on since mid June. Would be kinda creepy if the died and logged on though.

* about 10 people that followed me because of a FollowFriday.

* about 5 people that followed me because of a FollowFriday and will leave in 1-3 weeks because I wont follow them back because they only talk about American Football.

* about 15 people that followed me back because I followed them. They don't really care as long as they have alot of followers.

* about 40 people (the rest) that actually appreciates me for me and my dry Swedish humor.

Me, I only follow people that makes me feel happy. And some informative people that I find useful or fun.

So you see. I'm still actually the underdog....

As time goes by

Could you say that your old girlfriends kids, that they "made" after your relationship, are cute? Of course I'm looking at this from the male perspective, but I guess it goes both ways. I think that as soon as your relationship is over and she gets a kid, it's labled "goblin" by default.I don't think it matters if you ended the relationship or if she did. Or that you agreed about breaking up, it is and will always be a goblin.

You never get to be completely happy...

I thought I could start a post and save it and then later pick it up again and it would get the same date as I publish it. Turns out I can't. Bummer.

May I Have Your Attention?

I like attention. Let's face it, everyone that blogs or Tweet likes attention. Anyone who say differently should write in Notepad or in an old fashion diary. I started out using Twitter because I heard about it on the radio about a year ago. I wanted to find funny famous people to follow. People that I thought would lighten up my days at work. I started following @ThisIsRobThomas (Rob Thomas, lead singer from Matchbox 20) when he had about 500 followers. Now he's got >140.000. Back then he actually replied on one of my tweets. But is he fun to follow? No he's not. I tried "Weird" Al Yankovic. If anyone would be fun to follow he'd be the one, right? Wrong. I've found that famous peopel use Twitter as free advertising. Which makes me kinda sad, but that was actually the idea with Twitter in the first place... Not to make me sad, but to advertise. David "Bud Bundy" Faustino replied to me when I wrote in a tweet that I heard that he'll play Bilbo in "The Hobbit" 2011. I ment it as a joke, because he's short as hell. After that I find his tweets to be really annoying. Just RT'ing every message anyone writes to him, even if it's funny or not. So to conclude this, there are no funny famous people on Twitter. But there are alot of funny non famous people. And even though I'll never be as accepted as people with english as their native language I'll do my best to entertain. So I guess it feels extra good when I DO get the attention. Personally I don't think that my funniest tweets are on this list but some are. So if you're on Twitter and wanna gimme some attention, this is a good way. http://favstar.fm/users/MaDom

It's a timeline, so you have to read it from the bottom.

The Day Sweden Almost Became a Republic

Some years ago (I could probably tell you how many years if I counted, but then I'd be depressed and stop writing) I did my military service in the forest around the Swedish town of Luleå. For one week we were gonna be main guards at two of the royal castles in Stockholm. One castle is in Old Town and is more or less a tourist attraction nowadays. The other one is on an island called Drottningholm and is the residence of the royal family. I was was ordered to be at the last one. One evening I was guarding the entrance the royal familys personal habitation when a car came driving and stoped about 25 meters (~80 feet) from me. Out of the car came a young girl. She started to walk towards me, straight towards me. Our orders were to keep people away from the gate. No one besides the royal family, who always came driving by in 150km/h (~93 mph) were allowed in, if they didn't have an invitation. As this girl moves towards me, and not my co-guard who had list of people allowed, I started thinking about what I should do if she comes too close. My automatic rifle had a bayonet mounted on it, mostly for show but still sharp and shiny. I remember thinking "stop, stop, stop, stooop" And just as I was gonna raise my hand as a stop sign, and yell "HOLD" I saw our second lieutenant walking up from the right side. He saluted the girl and said "Good evening, princess!". I wonder what would have happend if he wouldn't have been there to save my ass. I bet she still would remember me though...

The Princess

You SOB!

This is not my first blog. I used to blog every day at another site, for a whole different reason. But I quit when I realized that what I was doing got people killed over seas. Oh wait, no that's some movie... The reasons for quitting the other blog was just that I came to the end of an era. Or so I thought. When shit started to hit the fan again, I just couldn't start writing about it, again. I think I summarized it pretty good in yesterdays Tweet though:

I just realized that my son is a son of a bitch... Well you don't choose your mother, so I wont hold it agains him.

This blog will be just for fun. Sort of an extended Twitter page. Where I'm not limeted to only 140 characters.

Jaywalking

On my 7-8 min morning walk from the appartment to the subway station, I pick a subject that comes to mind and then I analyze it. It's the "me" time of the day. Sad? Of course. But that's how it is to be an adult with kids. So I don't really piss and moan about it.

Anyway... This morning I thought about when my friend told me we should cross the street at the crossing point, because then the car drivers weren't alowed to hit us with their cars. I asked him if they were alowed to hit us is we crossed the street at any other spot than the crossing point. He looked at me as if I were born yesterday, and I don't mean in that "oh, a baby, how cute"-kind a way. And he said that, of course not. But that then we would be the ones to blame.
I'm not sure where we were going that day, but we didn't speak of it again.

So now, 2-3 years later, I find myself crossing the street, and I start to think about it again.
So is it okay to drive along the road and when ever you see someone who crossed the street at a place they weren't supposed to, you could speed up and take aim with the car?
Could you have a personal best of 14 hits on a single day and not end up behind bars?
"I'm sorry officer, but those old people where just too slow. And now I'm in a hurry , so could you please scrape them off my bumper and I'll be on my way!?"
Nah, course not. That's not possible unless you're a welthy person in some developing country. Or if you're playing one of those video games like GTA or Saints Row.

But you should be careful crossing the street. Honestly. Someone (probably) loves you, and would miss you if you'd die. And if you're driving, take it easy out there. Someone (probably) loves that person you're aming at.